Tuesday 28 April 2009

Male education....a life long process

A new two-year higher degree is being offered by the University of Manchester, England, this coming Autumn. Details have been released now due to the anticipated heavy demand. In the interests of educational and academic balance, blog readers are invited to suggest titles for any further modules that may have been overlooked.

Becoming a Real Man. MA degree (Male Arts).

Program outline.

FIRST YEAR

Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101 Combating Stupidity
MEN 102 You Too Can Do Housework
MEN 103 PMS - Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104 Women Do Not Want Sleazy Underthings for Christmas

Winter Schedule:
MEN 110 Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at 4am
MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100 Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101 Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A What's Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:
MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like a Complete Arse 'When You're Wrong'
MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122 YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR

Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101 You CAN Fall Asleep without Sex
SEX 102 Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103 How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201 How to Put the Toilet Seat Down
Elective (See Electives Below)

Winter Schedule:
MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211 How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212 You Too Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213 Honestly, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 1

Spring Schedule:
MEN 220 Omitting the 'f' word from Your Vocabulary(Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221 Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222 Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223 Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2

Course Electives:
EAT 101 Cooking with Tofu
EAT 102 Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103 Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231 Mothers-In-Law
MEN 232 Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233 Just Say "Yes, Sweetheart"

Although a higher degree, it is recognized that this course may not be rigorous enough for some students, so a taught PhD course is also being considered;

'Women: what are they thinking when they say or do those things?'

Prior advanced study of neural networks will need to be demonstrated, although the relevance of this to the subject matter has yet to be determined.

Previous research relating to the possibility of chemical synapses in women will also be looked on favourably. The highly theoretical nature of such research is acknowledged.

8 comments:

  1. laughing here....I've seen this before, but it looks as though some items have been added since I last perused these courses.

    I believe there are classes for women as well....and just as funny...although I question the validity of them, of course.

    :-P

    Thanks for the laugh Michael Michael Motorcycle

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  2. What percentage of passing grades are you expecting in this degree? Will there be any one completing it?

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  3. Ah Jacqui B....such high hopes you have...

    hehe

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  4. There is an important module missing although I suppose it could be covered in Electives: i.e.

    Various Interpretations of the Word 'FINE'

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  5. I'm still laughing!

    Just by coincidence, my entry in this week's Poetry Wednesday goes right along with your course MEN 201.
    here

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  6. Too bad there's not a doctoral program.

    Thanks for the giggles. I laughed out loud on a few of them!

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  7. Hello Michael,

    Perhaps they should include a short course on Acceptable Responses to the question "Does my bum look big in this?" ?!

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  8. Michael, as some of my students might say....
    "You be baaad, Mistah Michael!"
    I was really laughing. I may read this to my seniors on Friday!!!

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